We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize
