dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
