Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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