We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
