My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
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Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
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It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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