So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
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She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
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You need Xanax blowdarts
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.