Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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