Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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