dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
porn star boner night. come get it.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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