come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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