Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
