Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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