Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
