I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
