3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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