i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Sober January is a disaster.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
