do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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