We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I think i got beer on your cat.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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