I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
