So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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