Sry I called you an 8
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
