Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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