I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
