hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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