I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
accomplished twins. life is a go
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
