did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
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She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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