yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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