I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize