I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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