I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
so let's talk penis.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
