I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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