I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
