Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
