I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
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I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
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ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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