Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
