I like to think it a success when the cops are called
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
