what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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