tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Text me some of your sweat
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
