I faked an abortion last night.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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