Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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