Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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