dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I want a musical about memes.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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