um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
