If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
