Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
