I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
