There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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