i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize