he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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