You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
